Denial

here would be the two songs for this act:

Since we lost Wrangler (something I still really can't fully talk about) we've kept our eyes on Craigslist and the local shelters. Though Rain does not have the history I do, she understood that since my first memory, I've always had dogs. It's built into my psyche. Not only do I feel unsafe without them but...the loss of that leaves me feeling not quite whole. So though we just lost Wrangler, we understood that Maddie still has mouth cancer and it is an inevitability that we will lose her as well. We wanted to take in another dog before that happens. That way, Maddie would help keep the new dog in line and when that terrible time comes that we have to put her down because the tumor is too large in her mouth, we'll be forced to not close ourselves off. After all, that dog would be there to remind us that though the loss is substantial, the relationships are worthwhile.

With that in mind, we had been looking forward to the Super Adoption event that was held this last Saturday. Shelters from all around the area would bring hundreds of cats and dogs to the event, already spayed, microchipped, and ready to go home. Because Rain worked the night before, Tabby and I took my sis and we went and looked for ourselves first. At first, I was disappointed since there were very few dogs that met what we were looking for. We wanted a large breed dog because I've never liked small dogs and we wanted a senior, because they tend to be so well mannered already and so few people are willing to even consider them. The problem was that the shelters were bringing only the dogs they thought most likely to be adopted. That meant small and young. I only saw one dog there that they admitted was a senior (out of hundreds, remember) and there was perhaps three or four that would qualify for our definition of large (80 pounds or so). On our first round, we were just looking for what was available. A little dog with an adorable face caught our attention the first time but we still went around the second time. I asked the staff after possible dogs left at the shelters that would meet our hopes. There were exceedingly few. One was a golden lab that was undergoing heartworm treatment, the exact same thing that we just lost Wrangler to. The staff woman tried to write it off as being something minor, though the dog had just begun, and in some ways I was angry because it belittled the loss and the threat these dogs represent to the community but I was also saddened because I have been hearing more and more about other heartworm cases. The main reason we put Wrangler down when we did was because his threat to the community. But because of the dogs being brought here after Katrina and the laxadaisical attitude people hold for its seriousness, it looks to be spreading anyway.

We would have left then but I remembered that small dog that had caught our eye. Within a few short minutes he had won our hearts. He is much smaller then any dog I'd usually consider, though some referred to him as large. He's 25 pounds and they told us he was 8 months old. In many ways, he was the opposite of everything we were looking for. But there was something in his eyes. We ended up adopting him. Soon after, we found out that in fact, he was not 8 months, that he was much closer to 5 1/2 months. That's the youngest dog my family has had since I was 11 and a rott pup followed me home. Also, he has the promise of getting much larger. Perhaps 4 inches taller and 20 pounds heavier, which makes us happy. He's really adorable and though he and Maddie had a rough beginning, they now get alone splendidly. He has yet to show very bad habits beyond a tendency to be mouthy when playing and jump up toward the table when there's food.

We will have him tested for heartworm ASAP.

In good news, something strange has happened with Maddie's tumor. It seems to have receeded. It no longer looks angry and she can close her mouth all the way again. It seems to be pulling away from the jaw and though it sound weird, it looks like if it continues to do that....that it'd fall off. It's the oddest thing but where the molar used to be almost fully encased, the tumor has pulled back, exposing the whole thing and allowing the top teeth to clench without causing problem. We tried to get a picture but were unable to. It seems very possible that the doxy (antibiotic) we're giving her is helping. Wouldn't that be an irony? That the simple med that was the first, supposedly-easy step for treating Wrangler, and the reason he had to be put down, might actually extend Maddie's life, something that we were told was little more than impossible?

We'll see.

Pics.

Beautiful Maddie on Beautiful New Lawn

Oliver?

What is one thing you MUST do before you go to bed at night?

Take off my bra. Otherwise, the evil spirits that live in the underwire strangle me in my sleep. They are a vindictive lot.

Today, I noticed that I have a small line on my forehead. A line! On my forehead! The last year and a half has been hell and it's cost us a lot but...Oh my god, it gave me a worry line. It's small and subtle. Really only a line when I'm worrying but it's still a worry line! Oh cruel fates...

Still, the world has kittens so I guess it all evens out.

Kitten

I just got home from having to euthanize one of our dogs. It's a really terrible situation and I find that I simply can't write about it. But the reason for this post is to mark what the first thing I read when getting back was. I was checking out the wonderful site, Jezebel, when I came upon this article. At first, I thought it was terrible luck to come across that right after having to put Wrangler down. But I think it was actually the opposite. What it said really helped me deal with the situation. So, thanks Jezebel. And thanks, Wrangler; love you, babe.

Quote:

As I've said before, adopting a pet is perhaps the most masochistic thing we humans can do to ourselves. We develop affection, friendship, and unconditional love for our companion animals, all with the knowledge that we will be completely bereft and broken-hearted when we (inevitably) outlive them. But the upside of that total buzzkill (sorry) is that those of us who grew up alongside animals are lucky to have experienced those emotions; through them, we were given the tools to cope with love and loss, specifically, the ability to understand that just because loved ones are out of our lives, the impacts they made remain.

Wrangler on bed

Yep, I am once again ill. I don't think I mentioned it last time since I was slightly better than death warmed over. Yeah yeah, I know that you all believe I have a superhero worthy immune system. And I do! But I am convinced this year's coughing yuckiness is a super bug. My family has met its kryptonite. All of us have had it at least once now. Poor Rain has just recovered. With my luck, I have caught it right before my midterm. Thankfully, I don't expect it to be a terrible one. That is unless in the next day and a half or so it gets much, much worse. But let's keep our fingers crossed that that doesn't happen, shall we? Until then, I sit here in front of a fan holding a frozen bag of Brussels Sprouts. Yeah, I think I have a little fever on top of us having a couple days of very warm weather. What will make me feel better?

Eddie Izzard. Duh.

and Ellen.

I came across this article on Advocate.com today and I just wished to share it. I have heard reports of Barack Obama addressing LGBT issues before but I was very interested to see his exclusive interview on the subject with The Advocate. I was really impressed by his responses and ideas and wanted to share the article with my friends. I definitely recommend reading it. I think it was a very good interview.

If you follow this (like I did, dammit, LOTR got me again) you will find Yahoo! Mail's new promotional vid. I think they're trying to get me to upgrade to something. Unfortunately, they just showed me the only content I'd upgrade for. That is unless hobbits start IMing me with "What's up, G?"

Damn, that was ten times better than the last Lucas film.

Show us a photo of cherry blossoms in bloom.... Or, if you don't have cherry blossoms where you live, show us a photograph of any flower in bloom!

Novel upload 160

Novel upload 154

Novel upload 165

Show us a beverage you absolutely can't stand the taste of.

Beer

Beer. It's absolutely revolting.